, can I be really honest with you?

There have been many times over the last 2 years that I have wanted to get in my car, drive off somewhere, anywhere and not come back!!

It all got too much on several occasions and I just wanted to run away from everything!

After the last 2 years of ‘pandemic-ing’ I know I am not alone in thinking we have done enough coping, adapting, grieving and pivoting to last a lifetime!

I know I’ve been stretched to my own limits as a fitness coach, as a wife, as a daughter, as a friend….. and I’m sure many of you have too.

And it still hasn’t ended, has it?

Pandemic lasting more than 2 years and still continues to have an impact on us, war, price increases along with all the other things such as racial injustice, gender discrimination, climate crisis!

There is so much to absorb, to process and to deal with!

Not to mention everything that we are dealing with on a personal level. Career, family, friends and our own well-being! With everything going on around us, someone still has to answer the e-mails, put the bins out and do all the other day to day stuff!

Just over 2 years ago, due to the pandemic, I had to close my studio as I could no longer run my business from there.

My world turned upside down! I was devastated!

Not only was the studio our only source of income but it was my world! I had devoted years building my business. I loved my members the banter, the pride I felt when they achieved their goals!

The day we closed, I remember posting a live video onto Facebook to give everyone an update! I was determined not to cry…I cried…and I was live so I just had to go with it! I thought I’d lose everything!

I pivoted and put my classes online! I was keeping my members sane…their words…and it kept me sane too knowing that despite how I was feeling, I needed to show up for them!

I pivoted lots of times over the last 2 years! I was closed, due to lockdown, more than I was open during the whole pandemic! Keeping up with all of the restrictions, what to do, what not to do was exhausting!

I was on a roller coaster but there wasn’t any chance of me getting off!

I sustained a shoulder injury from vigorously cleaning the studio floor to get it ready for reopening after the first lockdown! Little did I know that the injury would still affect me almost 2 years on!! I was in so much pain but struggled on, teaching the majority of the classes.

During this time, I stopped doing my own workouts….I was in too much pain with my shoulder, I was exhausted from keeping the studio running, ensuring I was doing everything right, keeping my clients safe, sticking to the regulations and trying to keep my business going which left nothing for me!

I put on weight, I lost a lot of muscle mass and I lost my confidence!!

The 3^rd lockdown was by far the hardest for me personally and for the studio.

The pandemic devastated my business and we had to make one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make. We had to close the studio last October! The lease was due to end and the rent was going to be increased by 30%. The numbers were not supporting the studio as it was so we had to make the incredibly hard decision to close the studio.

We had found a smaller space from which to run some of my fitness sessions and it was planned to be ready by November which would have meant that we could have moved out of the old space and into the new space without any gaps. However, due to a shortage of materials the new space wasn’t going to be ready until a much later date. Five months later and it is finally ready for us to start using.

During those five months, I felt in limbo!! I was able to run some of the sessions in a community hall and online. This meant more losses in my business but there was nothing I could do. I kept up to date with my existing members during this time but I pretty much stopped sending e-mails and posting on social media. I didn’t feel I had anything to say, anything to offer. I was spent! I needed to take some time out to get back to me!

I’d been told by my consultant that it was likely I would need to have an operation on my shoulder. Knowing this, I decided that I needed to get as strong, as fit and as healthy as possible so that should I have the operation, I would at least have a better recovery. So last October, I started doing my own workouts, tracking my foods and started putting myself as a priority, which is something I had not done since opening the studio! …(more about my own fitness journey to follow in future e-mails)!

What I know is this:

What stopped me from driving off, never to return was concentrating on the only things that I was able to control. I worked hard on my mindset and acted on what I could do. I had to stop worrying about the things that were not in my control.

The things I could control are what I ate, my workouts, scheduling time to go for a walk…this helps me de stress. I deleted the negative messages I received because I wasn’t doing what others wanted me to do and instead focused on the positive messages I received. I focused on the sessions I could teach and the clients that stayed with me.

All these things have helped me cope with the things that have been thrown at me but I realise that I also need something else beyond my coping mechanisms…we all need something else…..

We need each other

I needed to be back with my people.

Fortunately I was able to continue seeing some of my fabulous clients in person and for this I am so grateful, I need them just as much as they tell me they need me!

What we need right now is a deep community. We need the connection of being with each other, of looking in each other’s eyes and feeling seen, heard and witnessed. Collectively we are more powerful.

We need to be physically with each other - even when everything is telling us we shouldn’t.

Which is what stopped me from driving off, was actually the prospect of the new studio and being back with my people. I can feel in my bones the power of what the new space is going to bring, not only to myself but to my members too.

It’s been over 2 years since we’ve been able to be together without all of the restrictions and we need it more than ever to deal with this heartache, soul ache, exhaustion, dismay, apathy…..

It’s time to draw a line under the sand and say that we are not doing this alone anymore.

I can’t wait to welcome my current clients, old and new clients into our new studio over the coming months.

The new studio has a new name: BeFit

It’s all about the individual. The meaning of Befit is: suitable for a particular person, place or thing. It is appropriate, happy, right, fitting, tailor-made…. And that is exactly what BeFit is all about!

At BeFit we can Be Strong, Be Flexible, Be Confident, Be You…… you can be anything you want to be.

Come and connect with us at BeFit open day on Saturday 23^rd April 10am – 1pm. No need to book, just turn up!

Our team will be there to tell you about the sessions we will be running and to answer any questions you may have about your health and fitness goals. We have sessions for women only as well as mixed sessions.

You can find us at:

BeFit

Unit 11 The Barns

Hewell Road

Tardebigge

Bromsgrove

B60 1LP

 

Nicki xx

(One woman feeling that it’s all too hard and needing her sisters)